I'm finally in a relationship

So the secret is out! I'm in a relationship! Ok, before some of you start blowing up my phone asking for details I'll write it on this blog.

Let me describe this special someone. In Numbers 23:19 it describes this someone as not being a man. It's actually God. Yes, I've finally come to that point in my Christian walk with God that He really is or rather He has to be my all in all.

I can't explain it guys but I'm so in love with the Lord. I went through a painful time laying down my rights to a "relationship" and eventually I've just let it go.

My heart cries out for women who cling to men hoping to find their self-worth and fulfilment. I used to dance to the same record of  "You are nothing without a guy in your life".  I don't know if I was really serving God before, I guess I was but He was always second in my life. I know, the shame of it all.  Nevertheless, right now I can get up and talk about God's faithfulness because I've seen it myself. I can get up and preach about God drawing near to the brokenhearted because the past 6 years of my life I've seen the hand of God in my life.

I'm finally in a relationship guys.  There is still this longing for human companionship but oh that void I felt for years, God is filling it.  If I am to become the "missing rib" of one young man, I am just a vessel because God can only fill that space in a guy's life really. 

This morning I was on my knees praying and I just began to cry and the tongues just began to flow. My heart began to stir up again for the Philippines. For some of you who didn't know but it's been a childhood dream to travel to the Philippines. However, I believe I got distracted by the things of this world and forgot all about it. I endeavour to travel out there when I graduate from Law School next year. It's in God's hands at the moment. There are  women that I am beginning to admire. I've put my Help-Meet books aside and have taken up books by Amy Carmichael and Carrie ten Boom. These women were World Changers.  Currently I am reading "Sacred Singleness by Leslie Ludy".  This book is A-mazing! . I can't stress this enough women of God. Never ever take this single season as a waste of time. When my heart began to break just as God's heart broke it was because He was uncovering all the desires He had placed there earlier. God doesn't just want us to just say the "sinner's pray". He desires a relationship with us young ladies.  I don't think I was in a relationship with the Lord before. I really wasn't.  I was just a Christian but God had been knocking on my doors for years.

Nowadays, I wake up in the morning with a "go-getter" attitude.  I know it sounds childish but I feel as though I can conquer the world and with Him all things are possible. My desires that I had planted in me years before were just stagnant and were gathering dust but my Lover has uncovered them.

My parents always told me that if I am to marry in the future, the guy should be able to uncover dreams and desires within me.  The guy should want to propel me forward in every way imaginable. That's exactly what God has been doing these past few months.

How can I sit here and say that my affliction, my tears, my struggling was in vain? Heaven forbid! I learnt who my Maker was in those dark times. I will be forever grateful. I learnt that nothing could ever take the place of God. Nothing! Do you know how horrible and tormenting it can be to always look at the opposite sex for security? Young women have ended up in Mental Institutes due to failed relationships or worse ended up in the grave.

I have so much to be thankful for and go on my knees for. I remember I got a personal message from Joyce Meyer herself and she gave me a book as a gift.  She planted a seed in my life and so many others did the same thing.  My heart breaks for young women, my heart breaks for broken families, my heart breaks for the brokenhearted. I want to be able to give back...

 Opportunities have just been coming up from the left and the right these past few months and yes I am grateful that I am single so I can do all these things.

 So Mr Right hasn't come along just yet. Well actually he Has. God is Mr Right. Whoever said He can't be? I'm finally in a relationship and I just want to go deeper and deeper with God.

Thanks for reading! Remain blessed

BLOG SWITCH OVER IN A FEW WEEKS- STAY TUNED!! It's going to be wild!

Capturing the Photograph

I just love this photograph. It was taken in 1991 in Diyarbakir, Turkey. A Kurdish woman is put on trial for alleged treason but her only crime was to stand up for the rights of the Kurdish minority in Turkey.

This photograph is one of my favourites, I just love the expression she has on her face. Yet she is dressed so nicely and very feminine but it's her face that captures the essence of the photograph. Almost like it says

"Though everything is against me, I've lost everything and the storms are blowing. I will stand in the midst of it all and stay strong. I wll keep my head up."

I had a sudden urge to encourage you (yes you)

This morning I woke up with this song in my hear titled "Thank You Lord (For being there for me)" by Fred Hammond.  Personally, I was remembering the goodness of God and where He has brought me from. The Word of God says that "We know that God works all together for good for those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" Romans 8: 28.
I can bet my life on it that God has a plan and purpose for you! It's sometimes so so hard to see this in the midst of our trials and tribulations but God is faithful and He is working the best out for you. I have been so encouraged today, despite sitting here doing my work the Holy Spirit has just been ministering to me.
Let me encourage you whilst I encourage myself.  You may have felt hurt, embarrased, ashamed by things which were and were not in your control but if it wasn't for the Lord we would have died in our mess. He has not finished with your story and He is able.
Stay focussed on Him and just give Him thanks. I know sometimes you just want to give up and let everything in your world fall apart. But wait my sister! God isn't finished. Though the bills are high, though your child is still dealing that dope, though your husband hasn't found work yet, though you thought you were in love but your heart got broken. Hold on!  God is with you! The bible says Hope will never fail.  No matter what happens God has a plan and it is a good plan! No it is the best plan!
Just say thank you ! He is awesome. I've been through some of the worst type of pains, I've cried until I felt my insides were going to fall out. I've rolled around my bed in agony because of the burden I was carrying. But if it wasn't for the Lord by my side...! Today I am a testimony of the  Lord Jesus Christ , I have no regrets about what I went through. I am glad I went through it even though at the time I couldn't see it. I can wake up with a smile on my face and know His promises that today is going to be a good day.  I can prove that the scripture which says that Jesus came to bind up the brokenhearted (Isaiah 61:1). He did it in my own life!
I know what it feels like when all your friends desert you in the midst of your pain, I know what it feels like to never have a phone call or an email when you needed it the most. That's o.k because you are bigger than all that. You may think it sucks at the time but that is God showing you who your true and faithful friends are. Just make sure you return the favour to all those who comforted you when you cried. 
I just had a sudden urge to encourage you (yes you).

Please stay tuned for the BIG BLOG SWITCH OVER. Yes this blog will be taken a new and an amazing God ordained turn!
COMING SOON!

Are Single Christian Women settling for less?

Recently, I've been discovering who I really  am. Determining my likes and dislikes, what type of clothing I prefer to wear , right up to my political party. I officially changed my facebook political status. Yes, my secret is out, I am no longer swinging to the Left but I am opting for the Conservative Party. Sorry fellow Sussexinites, I have turned my back on Liberalism.
Another thing that I have been thinking about is the plight of Single Christian Women in today's 21st Century. As time goes on, and the wiser I get I have begun to question my surroundings.

Are we young women settling for less than God's best in exchange for marriage?  Marriage is awesome and I cannot wait to tie the knot someday. However,  I have started to question my motives. The other day I had a conversation with my good friend Marie regarding her current relationship status with her beau. They've been going strong for a good while now and marriage is definetly a hot topic for them. I love Marie to pieces but she made a comment the other day which I had to strongly disagree with. It was just general banter about life, family and the topic soon switched over to marriage.  Marie quite openly told me that her desire for the future was thus : "All I want to do is serve my husband to be. I don't care about anything else".  Marie is fine with me sharing this. We are cool like that...

However, Marie never pursued higher education. I am not saying without education you are screwed, no I know many people who forfeited going to university in pursuit of something else and were quite succesful. Nevertheless, if you are like Marie your story may not end up like that.  So many of us (including myself) can become so disgruntled with our single situation as single christian women, so many of us are 18, 19, 20, 21 not  60!  I am 22  and science tends to prove that women reach their fertility height at 23!  No wonder so many young women out there are pulling their hair out because at 15 Mr Right hasn't come along yet.

What's my point here?  We seem to stop living before we get married. We think that life begins when the "I do's" are said.  I THINK THAT! But God needs to be our all in all. I know it's hard because sometimes you feel like an outcast in church because singleness is not easily welcomed. Yet God is working in our singleness.  Personally, and I am sure I can speak on behalf of a lot of my friends in Sussex that God has put each and everyone of us to use in our time as single ladies. Don't stop enjoying yourself because no suitable suitor has come to ask for your hand in marriage. Fellow college ladies, ask God what He wants to do with you in your college, and ignore the lies that the enemy whispers to you about universit not being a place for christian women.  I am speaking to myself too. I have a desire to become the missing "rib" of one young, handsome man one day. I mean constantly I am praying for Channing Tatum to become saved, partly because I want to marry him but my life doesn't end there. I need to find my happiness NOW! In the Lord. I have spent too long stuck in the future and I have missed a substantial part of the Lord's doing in my single life. I don't want to do it again. Yes, wait patiently  on the Lord in faith and He will bring the right one along. But it also says faith without works is dead. So stop moping around all sad and depressed, get an education and pursue God in it. He hasn't finished with us young ladies yet. Settle only for God's best

Sorry I haven't passed through in a while...

I am bogged down with an essay deadline regarding the co-ownership of property but I should have a new article up and running.
Other than that I love the Lord, He has been great and I will enter His courts with thanksgiving in my heart.

Journey to emotional healing part II

In Nigerian culture, the "Ada" is the first born daughter is a prized possession. She is highly favoured by her parents, she has an extremely demanding role to play within her family and everybody has high positive aspirations for her. "Ada-eze" in the igbo language  can be translated as "Princess".  I grew up knowing my role as the "Ada" of my household. I knew I was of value and I knew I was a woman who demanded respect. But good old fashioned Western Hollywood tends to minimise the Princess Daughter of the home.  We begin to compare ourselves to supermodels and what the "ideal woman" should look like. However, when our individual characteristics don't add up to Hollywood zombies we begin to feel like we are worthless.


I have suffered  rejection before. And don't lie to me, you have too.  You feel as though you have been thrown away, that you are an invalid and you are not the "Ada" you once were.  We suddenly ask questions such as "What's wrong with me?". For years I would ask myself this question. I thought something was extremely wrong with me. 
The scriptures says in Psalm 37:25 I was young and now I am old... When I began to go through a spiritual transformation and maturity, I began to  recognise all that my  Father in Heaven had for me. I began to recognise what His Word said about me.  If you are ever going to get over and beyond yourself you are going to have to take  the Word of God and stand upon it.  Many months I just stood on His Word and repeated scriptures to myself over and over and over again. I began to speak positive things about myself. When I was going through my Wilderness, I remember writing to Joyce Meyer Ministries just asking for prayer. I never got a response to my request but a few weeks later a gift arrived through the door. It was a book written by Joyce Meyer titled Healing the Brokenhearted which had daily scriptures which one could confess over and over to themselves.


I cannot stress this enough but there is POWER in the Word of God.  Isaiah 55:11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.  
No matter what has happened or what caused you rejection.  Just know the promises of God. Hold onto Him and He will lead your along the straight path.


Do I still feel pain? Yes, I do. I don't get upset about things as I used to though. Nevertheless, I did shed some tears the other day. They came out of nowhere but I also know the healing process hurts. Yet, I am glad I can go through all this knowing that God knew about this all along. Nothing ever surprises God! The healing process will hurt but as long as you keep your hands off the "wound" it will heal over. You are the prized "Ada" of the most High King!

Journey of emotional healing Part 1

You may or not know but I love fashion and I love to shop (when I have money).  Recently, it seems as though the fashion industry has flooded the shops with butterflies and pearls. From rings, to earrings, to bracelets to patterns on shirts.  Maybe I am in season hence the title of my blog- butterfly and pearls.
It's spring time! Season of New Beginnings.

I like Spring because when I look at all the flowers which are around on my grass, I remember winter. I remember that there wasn't a flower in sight.  England had a very bad winter but looking around now you can't even tell.  It's so funny that winter was so bitter this year as if it ran parallel with the first half of law school this year. I know I have spoken about it before and it was the Holy Spirt that got me through those dark nights. The word of God says about Christ in Luke 4:18 that The Spirit of the LORD is upon Me, because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor, He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed. 

I held on to that  scripture so tightly.  Pain is Pain. Yet we should never choose to experience it alone. Every night and day I would lock myself in my room and go to the feet of Jesus. I would just talk it all out with Him.  There is also one woman who helped me so much and her name is Joyce Meyer.  Before some of you shoot the messenger because of her gender, if this woman of God didn't stand up and take on the call of God, I don't know what I would have done.  Yes she has touched millions of people around the world but God knew that a storm was going to hit my life and He rose up Joyce Meyer for that reason too.   This woman knows about emotional healing. She has been there.  God will sometimes use your pain to help someone else later in  life.  Romans 8:28 states And we know that in all things God works for good of those who love him and are called according to His purpose.

When you are going through grief, pain, sorrow - go to the Lord. I can testify to this. I think I have learnt a valuable life lesson. No matter what life throws at you, go to the feet of Jesus.  Also what I have found to be encouraging in my life, is that every storm and  every trial God will permit in order to mould us. You may not see the reason for your pain but I can tell you this : hold on to God and He will be sure to keep to His promise in Romans 8:28.  

I think this also teaches me to trust Him so much more.  Even though many of my questions go unanswered, the Word of God always reassures me that all is well.   I think that's why Horatio Spafford could write the song "It is well with my soul" when he learned of the horrific deaths of his daughters.

I don't think I could sit her and write a blog if I didn't have a taste of the bitterness of life also.

The Encouraging Girlfriend. Why I want to marry William Wilberforce

I just want to set the record straight: I do not want to marry the dead 18th Century politician William Wilberforce.  I watched the film "Amazing Grace" last nigh. Nevertheless, I do want to discuss his courtship with Barbara Ann Spooner who later became his wife.  For those of you who are not sure of who William Wilberforce was, he sat in the House of Commons and campaigned heavily against the slave trade in Great Britain. Initially, he wrestled with the idea of God and politics and felt he should leave politics entirely to pursue "religion". Yet as his conviction grew stronger and the atrocities of slavery grew worse he finally listened to the Quakers who simply said "We humbly suggest you do both".  He knew the Lord required him to enter the House of Commons, and in 1807 the Slave Trade Act was passed abolishing slavery.

I want to concentrate on Barbara Ann Spooner. Her conduct throughout the film left a lasting impression on me. She knew what she believed in and was ready to tell the world.  I am sure this was frowned upon back then  because  for anybody especially a young lady to be associated with the abolition of slavery was a taboo or worse branded a  "revolutionist".  However, she encouraged William Wilberforce to go on campaigning against slavery despite all the reproach he was getting from his peers.  Though she could not enter the House of Commons herself (gender issues) if given the chance I am sure she would have.

I see this lady as role model for other young women. She didn't sit by idle and just wave her fan and play Bridge while William  wrestled with his campaign.  She read, she boycotted sugar imported from plantations , she wore "Anti-Slavery badges", she went on the picket line. She did all this before she met William.  It wasn't William who shaped her beliefs. It was the conviction of the Holy Spirit that shaped her attitude towards the evils of slavery.

My point here is that we as women have a role to play.  We all love to here about the Proverbs 31 woman.  I believe Barbara Ann Spooner reflected this woman in the bible.  Proverbs 31:16 states thus : She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard . The woman here is well learned and she is an excellent property buyer.  These are skills she may have acquired before she met her husband.  We all know that this time in our single lives, is a time we need to start learning how to handle finances. But there is something much more deeper than just finances. Shouldn't we women be out there? Shouldn't we young women speak out against injustices? Yes let me be a devil's advocate here, but shouldn't some of us be in the House of Commons?

The courtship between Barbara Ann Spooner and William Wilberforce really inspired me.  Hence my conclusion of wanting to marry a man just like him.  Barbara encouraged William not because he was her boyfriend but because she knew change was going to come and that God had called William to bring that change. That passion for justice had already been stirred up long before she met William.